Tonight America will get what it's been clamoring for ever since Justin Bieber decided his version of being a teen rebel would be egging his neighbors house. Trained assassins in the comedy world, and for some reason Shaq and Snoop Dog, will have their shot to tear Justin Bieber apart. Well, they had their shot two weeks ago and Comedy Central's just airing it tonight but you get where I'm going. Generations of people have watched roast's like this wither it be the days of Dean Martin and Don Rickles or Seth Rogen and James Franco. The idea is that you make fun of these people in a brutal way, hoping to walk the line between offensive and flattering. In recent years Comedy Central has hand picked comics like Anthony Jesselnik, Amy Schumer, Natasha Leggero, Jeff Ross, and the late, greats Patrice O'Neal and Greg Giraldo. These people were picked because they are not only hilarious but able to shock and offend while still keeping the audience on their side, for the most part. Now my description of these events is pretty accepted and acknowledged nationwide. That forces me to ask, why every year are their people who want the heads of the comedians who "offended" them?
Now I admit this style of humor isn't for everyone. If your idea of comedy is a night of watching kitten videos on Youtube and then 9 million episodes of "The Big Bang Theory" on TBS, then it's entirely possible that tonight's Comedy Central event isn't for you. I have a solution to that...stay with me now...Don't watch! If jokes involving race, gender, sexuality, rape or disease bother you, just don't watch. But for some reason tomorrow we will inevitably see the headlines "Did Hannibal Burress Take It Too Far?" or "Did Kevin Hart Cross The Line?". No matter what is said tonight, the answer to those questions is, NO! Anything said with the intention of humor should be accepted. The only acceptable question to ask will be, was it funny? There will likely be jokes told tonight that just aren't funny, for whatever reason. That doesn't mean that they are racist, homophobic, sexist, or otherwise hateful material. In 24 hours when some special interest group wants to end the career of one of these comics, I encourage them to, instead, consider the following suggestions. 1. Realize that you are watching COMEDY No matter how you felt about it, the intent of tonight for nothing to be taken literally. 2. Change the channel. If for some reason you don't want to feel left out of the live tweeting, give it a shot. You may have a few laughs. Then, if it starts to get too edgy for your taste, turn it off. Throw on the Disney channel or something you can stomach and your emotions won't hurt anymore. 3. Watch and be offended, but shut the fuck up about it. Laugh, cry, experience whatever emotions come naturally. Even be offended. Tomorrow you can bore your friends and coworkers with how you are "all for jokes but that went over the line" or "no one likes comedy more than me but that was too much". And if they don't do their civic duty of punching you in the face, you can move on with your day. Just don't start these online campaigns to force someone to apologize or be fired from their jobs. Because no matter how hard you stomp your feet, the apology will assuredly be forced and phony.
Sadly there will undoubtedly be some people who don't take my brilliant advice. There's a segment of the population who gets off on having their voice heard, no matter the cost. Context and reason means nothing to these people and it seems like a larger group now than it has ever been. In reality it is just a vocal minority of whiney children who didn't get enough attention from mommy and daddy so they want us to pay the price. If you follow any of my work you know this issue hits home with me. But as loud as I try to scream it seems to fall on deaf ears. No matter how much logic is used, some people just enjoy being offended. So depite the fact that Bieber and everyone else on the dais knew what they were getting into and still signed up for it, there will be people in society who are offended for them. Even though it wasn't asked for. So have fun little boys and girls. I know that there's no stopping you. I just hope it doesn't cost anyone their job this time.